Sunday, January 27, 2013

No Advice Needed.

When I ran across this at some point this weekend, it was meant for me. I read the first sentence and then saved the photo. I know that listening is not the same as "hearing". I also know that most of the time, including myself on many occasions, I "hear" what I want from a conversation and then I start in with my advice.

I am a caretaker by choice. It has taken me a good 20 years to figure this one out. From time to time I jokingly say it is a genetic trait that was passed on by my grandmother and leave it at that. Like I need some kind of excuse to stereotype myself this. I mean..whatever. So, I am a caretaker. A lot goes into taking care of people.

However, this leads me to the conviction of what I felt when I read the first sentence of the above. After a good long weekend with mom, I felt for the very first time in a long time that people need to just have a good ole fashioned talk out session sometimes. They want their feelings, actions, emotions, and experiences to be validated. Duh..don't we all? Having an emotional attachment to much of what is vented in this way (let's be real here, a talk out session with someone very close to you is about trust and rarely will I begin my advising on a stranger in the produce aisle venting about the cost of avocados....well...mostly. :) )

Seriously, though the emotional attachment provokes my advice giving serum and off I go..  Have I been so consumed care taking that I forgot what it was to really listen? Wow. Resolution #1 for me. Listen more. Really listen. Take into account that my reaction should be full of grace and encouragement and uplifting and supportive. And, not supportive in the way that "I think" is right based on my own advice of course :) (totally kidding), but supportive in the way that they need. Life is such a science right? Lucky for us, we have the opportunity to recognize when a revision of our actions is necessary and begin again. I did. Moving forward..I will listen and not just with my ears, but with my heart.

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